Dear Dr. Patti,
I have tried to forget all about this incident but I have not. When I read some of the stories on your site I knew I too had to share my experience with other girls.
When I was in forth grade I raised my hand to go to the bathroom. I had to go down a staircase and on the staircase was a sixth grade boy. He pushed me up against the wall, covered my mouth and pushed his fingers into my vagina. I was so scared. He kept his hand over my mouth and told me if I told anyone he would hurt me. I kept it a secret. I went back to class and acted normal. At the time my parents were getting a divorce and my mother spent many nights crying. I did not tell her about the incident. I saw the boy in the halls and he would always give me a scary look. I never told anyone about the incident, and I never used the school bathroom again until I was in highschool. I also always made sure to have at least one friend to walk the halls with.
Now I am 18 years old and I still think about what happened to me. I do have a boyfriend and I am not afraid of him or other guys for that matter, but I just wanted to tell someone what happened to me so that I could get it out. Was this sexual abuse? Am I crazy to keep remembering it?
Dr Patti responds:
Yes this was sexual abuse and no, you are not crazy to remember it. Probably because you never told anyone this incident has become even larger in your mind. The fact is, this boy was quite disturbed and probably really frightened you. You must have felt very isolated not telling and having to see him in the halls. The good news is, he can't harm you anymore, and you do have a boyfriend, and you are not afraid that other guys will harm you. Sometimes a girl just needs to tell her truth, get out her story and she begins to feel better and leave the incident behind. I hope this is the case for you April.
.....................xoxo, Dr. Patti.